(Source: ourtimeorg, via chasingtheelephants)

electricsed:

jamborii:

klefable:

skatersaint:

klefable:

shoutout to girlcode for being fabulous 

Be prepared to participate in no dick december

be prepared to be told that no one wants your misogynistic dick anyway you arrogant shit

I love it when guys use sex as a bartering tool like IF YOU DON’T LOOK PERFECT AND SPARKLY ALL THE TIME I’M NOT GOING TO PLEASE MYSELF WITH YOUlike BITCH THEY LITERALLY SELL DICKS BIGGER THAN YOURS I DON’T NEED SHIT FROM YOU

electricsed:

jamborii:

klefable:

skatersaint:

klefable:

shoutout to girlcode for being fabulous 

Be prepared to participate in no dick december

be prepared to be told that no one wants your misogynistic dick anyway you arrogant shit

I love it when guys use sex as a bartering tool like IF YOU DON’T LOOK PERFECT AND SPARKLY ALL THE TIME I’M NOT GOING TO PLEASE MYSELF WITH YOU
like BITCH THEY LITERALLY SELL DICKS BIGGER THAN YOURS I DON’T NEED SHIT FROM YOU

image

(via beansprouts)

sexhaver:

juicyjacqulyn:

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

scientists could scour the arctic for decades and never find anything colder than this

sexhaver:

juicyjacqulyn:

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

scientists could scour the arctic for decades and never find anything colder than this

(Source: baddaysequence, via beansprouts)

cumberbatchaddictsanonymous:

ottermatopoeia:

mattniskanenseyebrows:

OCTOBER IS NEXT WEEK

image

OCTOBER IS THIS WEEK
image

OCTOBER IS TOMORROW

image

(via becauseloveonlygrows)

theladypipsqueak:

salparadisewasright:

theladypipsqueak:

MY MOM DECIDED THAT SINCE I FUCKING HATE CLEANING THE LITTERBOX FOR MY DUMB CATS SHE’S ACTUALLY MAKE ME A FUCKING LITTERBOX CAKE. THIS IS A FUCKING CAKE. THOSE ARE SLIGHTLY MELTED TOOTSIE ROLLS. THOSE ARE LOTS OF COOKIE CRUMBLES. BUT IT LOOKS FUCKING REAL. I ATE THIS IN A RESTAURANT. I RECIEVED WORRIED STARES FROM OTHER PATRONS AS I FEASTED UPON FUCKING CAT POOP. MY BABY SISTER REFUSED TO LET ME EAT THE TOOTSIE ROLLS BECAUSE SHE WAS ONE HUNDRED PERCENT CONVINCED IT WAS POOP, SHE RIPPED IT OUT OF MY HANDS AND THREW IT BACK IT THE PAN.

"SISSY!" SOMEONE WAS LOOKING ON HORRIFIED AS SHE GRABBED THE DISTURBING LOOKING CANDY OUT OF MY HAND. "DONT EAT POOP SISSY!"

a li tter box cae k„

congratulations on turning 91

thanks

(Source: thesmuttypirate, via squidwardismyspiritanimal)

unlimitedgoats:

luxvriously:

My anaconda will consider it

My anaconda has, upon review of the information presented with it’s partners, decided that it, in fact, does not. My anaconda apologizes for any inconvenience this may cause and thanks you for your time.

(via megsmasters)

(Source: legollyblonde, via chasingtheelephants)

relatetable:

asvprock:

Your anaconda doesn’t even go here.

image

(via chickenpoodlesoup)

tipsymaple:

I may not be a perfect person but at least I have never yelled at an employee in a store

(via becauseloveonlygrows)

vivere-est-ars:

every woman on tumblr should have this on their dash

(Source: sizvideos, via chasingtheelephants)

unamusedsloth:

Even on an escalator. [Video]

iamprincessash:

I don’t even care how this happened

iamprincessash:

I don’t even care how this happened

(via xeansan)

17yr:

im physically incapable of having a productive conversation about how im feeling especially when it comes to relationships and stuff i cant even like look at people or be serious about it i will do anything to avoid sharing things like that

(via squidwardismyspiritanimal)

harrysadad:

"teen girls are super crazed!! it’s unhealthy!!" u ever seen a grown man when his stupid ass football team loses

(via beansprouts)

nickyrads:

leander-ligo:

lordthundercox:

Yes, it does.

Guys get morning wood because our bladders fill up during the night and begin to press against our prostate, causing arousal. Our dicks don’t just feel the sun coming up and think “My time has come”

I’m dying

nickyrads:

leander-ligo:

lordthundercox:

Yes, it does.

Guys get morning wood because our bladders fill up during the night and begin to press against our prostate, causing arousal. Our dicks don’t just feel the sun coming up and think “My time has come”

I’m dying

(Source: iraffiruse, via beansprouts)